Tuesday, January 26, 2010

My Fiancee is too Mexican

My finacee is Mexican. Her Mexican father had intercourse with her Mexican mother and they had a pretty little mexican baby. This isnt really a problem as I too am Mexican. Sadly, my parents did not have sex as I was brought into this world in some other way. I just had to be. Some may think by Stork. I like to believe I was brought into this world in a beam of light with seraphim and celebration a plenty. I guess thats just the realist in me.

Now this girl, she is much more Mexican than I am. You see if being ethnic were a candy she would be a halloween fun bag mix and I would be an after dinner mint, which really isnt a candy at all.

The most glaring depiction of how Mexican she is would be the amount of cousins she has. Every couple of months a new story brings to the forefront the fact that she has a cousin I previously did not know about. I have known her for eleven years and was only recently told about a cousin Frank that used to live in Northern Califonia. There can be only one of two logical conclusions to this phenomenon. She is a brilliant liar that chooses to lie about really boring shit like how many cousins she has or she is Mexican.

I guess this wouldnt be a problem if she identified them with a name every once in a while. Instead she chooses to use the descriptor "cousin" with no follow up name. So if she says oh my cousin said this or my cousin said that, I have to mentally calculate the odds that she is talking about one of 57 people. And thats one side of the family.

She also knows Spanish. This really doesnt equate her to being really ethnic. Rather, it shows how uncultured I myself am. My parents are both fluent in Spanish. The amount of spanish I speak however, is relegated to asking for the bathroom and stating that I am hungry. All in all I could probably live in Mexico without missing a beat.

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